Hard Knock Life

sitting in the library waiting for debbie to get here so we can go look for our classes. it feels like my whole day has been pretty much wasted. but charlie and i did go to this veggie place..omg it's good then we got gelato... i'll have to remember where the number 7 bus picks up for that...i'm so bad w/directions. i just spent a lot of money on my textbooks... i had my training for work today. it wasn't bad. this lady who is kinda my boss is in one of my classes. at first i thought it was cool, but then charlie and greg are like 'we hate her' so i'm wondering how this is going to turn out. since i wrote last i got a tattoo! yay of a little bull on my ankle. it hurt. still boyfriendless.... kinda sucks..a lot. i got to see my peeps in s.a. the other weekend. warren and i drove down for myra and jessica's party. i really like this guy that i met at the party but he goes to utsa so...not gona work out most likely... but he's TALL 6'4...aye aye aye. height is def my weakness. gregs friend patty came down from boston to audition for american idol...greg auditioned too... neither made it.. i don't care much for patty. well, i'm gona go...oh school starts wed..

just got off work...yay...bout to go back to the apt... stupid and i are not together... long story,..... oh well. things are going good... i'm in love ...but i don't know the guy's name...he come's in when i'm working..i guess on his lunch breaks or something... omg...he's divine... anywho, can't wait for classes to start.. i may have a roomy already for next year...unsure tho. write more later..i only have 30 min!

on campus.. i think i finally may have straightened my financial aid stuff out. i'm hungry.. talked to chase last night. he's going to a warped tour in dallas all day today. right now i'm about to go catch the FW. justin may come up tonight. i don't have money to do anything tho so it'll be boring. and i don't really feel like hanging out with anyone but he's loneley in san antonio i guess, and if it were the other way around, i'd want someone to hang out with me. so, i don't know. i saw danny deckchair-good movie and dead like me-okay series.. also motorcylce diaries..i love that movie .it makes me want to travel ..lol... more later. hope everyone, and by everyone i mean, paula and deb, is having a great summer.

aye. i'm here at campus... there has been sooo sooo sooo soo many problems with everything i try to get done. the two biggest of all: my financial aid and my sprint bill. my financial aid-they keep saying they need more info ...and then once they get the info they need...it'll be another month before i get my status.... (it's almost time for school to start!!) ughh. i hate those stupid financial aid people ... i do. my sprint bill/phone...i keep having to go to the sprint store on the drag every week...sometimes twice a week for prob with my phone...right now the picture mail password isn't working...and for last months bill, i think i was charged for my minutes after seven pm...ughh. i can't do anything until i get my invoices which will be in about a week... cs i STILL haven't gotten my chisholm hall deposit back yet..debbie and liz already got theres...and i still haven't gotten my grade rebate thing back..i seriously doubt if i'll get it.,........ ugh. so much crap. and i still have to do my health matriculation form... i had to get a shot this morning..i have to send riney some stuff for a scholarship.
more later.

[ ] I am bisexual or homosexual.
[x] I've consumed alcohol
[ ] I've run away from home
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[ ] I collect comic books. [does manga count...?]
[x] I shut others out when I'm depressed. [well... most others...]
[x] I open up to others easily.
[ ] I am keeping a secret from the world
[x] I watch the news. [er... sometimes...]
[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs. [nope, only 3...]
[ ] I own an iPod or MP3,MP3 cd player [T__T]
[x] I own something from Hot Topic
[x] I love Disney Movies.
[x] I am a sucker for hair/eyes
[ ] I don't kill bugs.
[ ] I curse regularly.
[ ] I paid for that cell phone ring.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic.
[ ] I have "x"s in my screen name.
[ ] I've slipped out an "lol" in a real conversation.
[ ] I love Spam.
[ ] I cook well.
[ ] I would wear pajamas to school.
[x] I own something from Abercrombie.
[x] I have a job.
[x] I love Martha Stewart.
[x] I am in love.
[ ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS
[x] I am self conscious.
[x] I like to laugh.
[ ] I smoke a pack a day.
[ ] I loved Perks of Being a Wallflower.
[ ] I loved Go Ask Alice.
[ ] I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
[ ] I can't swallow pills.
[x] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem
[x] I eat fast food weekly.
[ ] I have many scars.
[ ] I've been out of this country.
[x] I believe in ghosts.
[x] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[x] I love white chocolate.
[ ] I bite my nails.
[x] I am comfortable with being me.
[x] I play video games.
[ ] I'm single
[x] I'm in a relationship
[x] I've gotten lost in my own city.
[x] I've seen a shooting star
[ ] Been to any other countries besides the united states
[x] I Had a serious Surgery
[x] Gone out in public in your pajamas
[ ] Kissed a Stranger
[x] Hugged a stranger
[ ] Been in a fist fight
[ ] Been arrested
[x] Pushed all the buttons on an elevator
[ ] Made out in an elevator [Hm... >=3]
[ ] Swore at your parents
[ ] Kicked a guy where it hurts
[x] Been close to love
[ ] Been to a casino
[ ] Been skydiving
[x] Broken a bone
[x] Skipped school
[ ] Flashed someone
[ ] Saw a therapist
[ ]Done a split
[x] Played spin the bottle
[x] Gotten stitches
[ ] Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour
[x] Bitten someone
[ ] Been to Niagara Falls
[x] Gotten the chicken pox
[x] Kissed a member of the same sex
[ ] Crashed into a friend's car
[ ] Been to Japan [only in the airport, though.... =O]
[ ] Ridden in a taxi
[x] Shoplifted
[ ] Been fired
[x] Stole something from your job
[ ] Gone on a blind date
[x] Lied to a friend
[x] Had a crush on a professor
[ ] Celebrated mardigras in New Orleans
[ ] Been to Europe
[ ] Slept with a co-worker
[ ] Been married
[ ] Gotten divorced
[ ] Had children
[x] Saw someone dying
[ ] Been to Africa
[ ] Driven over 400 miles in one day
[ ] Been to Canada
[ ] Been to Mexico
[ ] Been on a plane
[ ] Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show [And I would see it again... many times... ^^]
[ ] Thrown up in a bar
[ ] Eaten Sushi [And I would eat it again... many times... XD]
[ ] Been snowboarding
[ ] Been Skiing
[ ] Met someone in person from the internet
[x] Been to a motocross show
[ ] Lost a child
[x] Gone to college
[ ] Graduated college
[ ] Done hard drugs
[x] Taken painkillers
[ ] Given a lapdance
[x] Had someone cheat on you
[x] Miss someone right now

at my friend jayde's apt right now. this week has been interesting..i haven't really had the time to sit down and think about my peeps from san a. so i haven't been feeling depressed about missing anyone really. i GOT A 4.0 THIS SEMESTER!!! YAY! SOOO OOOO OOO HAPPY! mmmkkaaay. lemme see what else... drama has been going on with Stupid... i'm so ooo ooo oo confused. a lot of my friends are in similar situations... diana with dan... gabe with scarlet.. .. okay, well maybe just two of my friends..hheehehe. oh, i have a 200 $ PHONE BILL... NOT SURE WHY.... i miss you debbers and paula poo!!!

i slept a total of 45 min in the past 24 hours.... i had my chem exam at 7 30 this morn..i don't think i did to fabulous. i did get to study with ryan and his friend joey last night (the hottie at the shuttle)
now i'm about to go with jenny when i should be packing/laundering.... i can't believe its over for me at utsa!!!!! how sad!!!!

i met a hot guy with a veggie heaven shirt on today.. (i had mine on, too) ...yeah, he was pretty hot..

i have a final tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!! aye. i'm worried about my chem final...really really really worried. i just got off the phone with my best friend diana... i miss her... i get to see her this weekend!! i talked to aaron too..he said on sunday he wants to hang out ..and he'd pay for whatever we did...hahaha. i found out that chase is #38 in his class...out of 38... no joke. i am so depressed. i dated him...aye. anywho, i might stay w/nessa when i go to I-T.... ok, i need to study

gosh, i haven't done anything all day. now, i'm watching oprah. i'm supposed to go to first friday with gabe and whoever else goes, i'm guessing jenny too. ..but well see if that goes through. i saw amityvill...it wasn't that great. chase called wed. and we talked and i told him i had to get off and hes like well when are you going to call me. and i said i didn't know, and he's like 'tomorrow?" and i said maybe, maybe not. well, he called me just now. but i think it was because he wanted to brag about his day...he took his boat to the lake, and tonight him and some friends are going to see house of wax and tomorrow hes going to cinco de mayo and will most likely get drunk. okay, anyways, he had to get off the phone, and he's like, when are you going to call me? and i said i don't know, and he's like i've called you twice without you calling me, and i'm like why do you want me to call you? and hes like, i just do... i don't understand him. but everytime he calls me he makes a comment about how he f*cked up and as a result we're not together. and the second thing he always says is something about how i'm a real friend to him and one of the only friends who cares about him... well this time, he said something we were talking about a car accident and he's like ..you're the only one who cares if i get hurt... and i said..'it depends on what kind of mood i'm in...i said something about 'cheatin' chase" and how i'd be happy if he got hurt, then i'm like but if i was in a good mood i'd be sad... maybe i shouldn't have said the first part! i just had to get a little dig in there. okay, i need to study! more later

today: went to class, ate lunch w/debbie.it was funny b/c after lunch we were sitting outside the uc rating guys as they walk by...and me and my BIG mouth...hahaha. this one guy omg he was heaven sent. he had on a pearl snap too, but anywho, i was like "he's a nine, def, a nine" and i kept saying it..hehehe he heard me. he turned around and just smiled ..i felt kinda stupid. c/s justin brought me flowers yest. he thought i felt bad, but i didn't really. blah blah blah...lemme see, what else...i know, i know, my life is just too interesting... i need to study...

sunday and monday were boring..all i did was try to study..didn't even do that.. um..oh, i went to justins and ate a hamburger... chase called while i was there. at first i felt so weird talking to him, and he even said something about how i sounded awkward, but then it got better and i actually liked talking to him. he said he quit drinking and his 'investments' (selling drugs) and he was in the process of getting his tattoo removed... and then he started in on how he missed talking to me and that he made a mistake (cheating) and he thinks about it all the time ( yeah, i bet that's what's going thru his mind when hes having sex with all of these diff girls)..and he said he wished it were different. and he said "who knows more about you than i do?" when he told me that we were still best friends. and i said just b/c you know more about me than anyone doesn't mean we're good friends...i could be a stalker and know a lot about a person, but that doesn't mean we're friends.. so i say 'whats done is done' b/c i don't want him to start talking to me like that b/c im weak..lol.. and he's like when you come to see your gma, i'll take you out, and not to dairy queen either...lol.. god, i miss him so much, but i'm not stupid, and i do respect myself enough not to give in to that bullspit again... speaking of, greg wants to take charlie back..charlie doesn't want him back, he's already cheated twice, greg is just a glutton for punishment.. but i understand how greg feels, b/c i used to feel the same about chase. greg asked charlie to go to california with him and start over ...charlie's like 'i have class' omg..i love greg so much but he needs to move on. but , i guess he'll figure that out with time. i need to study!! my exam is the day after tomorrow and i only have 6 slides memorized! oh, i met a guy at the shuttle stop this morning. he lives in chisholm, hes so cute and nice.! we have chem together and didn't realize it. i'm going to ask if he wants to study together... oh, what does 'exanimate' mean?

i FINALLY finished my paper today. i didn't go to history, so i could finish. now i'm studying for art history..i have to memorize like 60 slides before thursday. i have a headache. i talked to diana for like 2 hours yesterday..she told me that the tv station telemundo was at itasca school b/c a bunch of stuff happened. cory emailed me today. he went to edgefest yesterday and had a blast. i'm so jealous. gosh, today has been so boring. c/s this morning greg called me, he found out that charlie didn't go to see my gma..and so he broke it off w/charlie for good he said. but he said he loved me and he'd call later. this was at 6:30 am...i couldn't sleep for a couple of hours b/c i felt bad... c/s only a couple of weeks left!!!

yay!! i am no longer a rollercoaster virgin!!!!!!!!

i'm about to get ready for class :( after class i have to meet ashley and sara to study chem. :( :(
and then i need to spend all day studying for my test b/c i HAVE to get an A. yesterday...i went to class..and instead of going to asl..we got to go to starbucks. it was fun, it was just really far away.
there are actually a lot of attractive deaf guys... too bad i'm not fluent w/sign language.. and then at the other end of the spectrum are your old horny guys..hahahaa....that was so funny. jason had to save me from him. after starbuck i went to justins and hung out with him, brandon, rickey, jamie and eddie...sometimes liz..but i felt kinda bad b/c i think she felt like everyone was being mean to her. justin' new roommate is pretty cute, and so is his friend, but they seem like complete idiots. i'm sure they're nice guys, but for ex. last night, i listened to them have like a 5 min conversation on how they have to say, "bro" or "man" or "dude" at the end of the sentence for it to be complete.. omg. i thank God that i am not like that. anywho, not much else to say.... . . . . .. ... .... ..... oh deb remind me to tell you about 'in one eye and out the other' i thought it was funny, but i guess i'm the only one. lol.

my weekend has been pretty boring. friday was fun b/c of fiesta and stuff but yesterday and today have been a big disappointment. sam called and told me mamaw is pretty sick and that i need to see her asap..and greg and i can't get a hld of charlie.. i need to study and clean and launder...(hehehe not laundry) ok, pretty lame, i know... c/s i finally got AIM. i love it. i talked to holly last night. ok, i need to get off ..oh debbie...i need you to tell me how to make this for friends to view only. later

oh, how i love MWF!! i just have 1 class, .... i'm kinda sleepy now.. last night i spent time w/eddie and justin watching Cowboy Bebop. it was ok. i told my friend corin that i'd meet her to eat after she got off work..but i don't really want to. she kinda annoys me.. and jenny prob. won't go, so it'll just be me and corin. :( i need to start studying tonight, but i dont want to do that either.

right now, i'm waiting to go to art history. i don't want to go. i don't like my schedule on TR. anywho, liz's comp is driving me crazy ...every other minute a pop-up comes up.......arghh. i have a ton of studying i need to be doing. yep. justin told me that eddie wanted to ask me out, but i haven't talked to him or eddie since he told me. i don't know if i would say yes if he'd ask me out or not. he kinda gets on my nerves b/c he doesn't seem real..(he's a robot!) nah, i just mean, he seems like a phony , i can't explain it. maybe thats just b/c i don't know him that well. who knows. yeah yeah yeah. i'm still talking to cory, but nothing is moving forward in that relationship..unfortunately. oh, he asked me if i had a theme song, what would it be..? i'm still thinking. what would y'alls theme song be? i don't have anything else to say, so buh-bye.

i haven't posted anything on here in over a month! wow. right now, i'm watching dr. phil (i love that man). i just got back from the mexican restaurant w/rickey, brandon and justin. it was pretty good. my legs are sore from running last night... i haven't exercised in like a year so, yeah, it was quite the surprise. yesterday i went to this art opening thing. there were so many great pieces there. i wrote the number down to the director of the art guild so i could see about buying a piece but so far i haven't called him. i'm pretty sure it'll be too expensive..but i really want this piece called movement. it had a little puppy on it and it was really good. aye. i want it. i want it. i want it. then deb and i went to this asian thing and got some free food. it was pretty cool . it made me want to join a dance team or something. ha! chase called today while i was at the restaurant..and surprisingly, it didn't phase me at all. usually i sit there and dwell on it, but it felt good not to do that today. i may go to this drive in thing tonight, but i'm kinda hesitant because it's with the 'christian people' and the one's i've met seem so stupid and fake. that's a harsh statement, i know, but oh well. but i'll probably go b/c i've never been to a drive-in movie before. i need to study this weekend. hopefully liz will go home so i can enjoy the peace and quiet of having the room to myself. well, more later....

i feel really overwhelmed with all the stuff i need to be doing...key words 'need to be' gosh... and then today wasn't that great..this week hasn't been really great. first stuff w/my sister and then with Stupid. and i think i've officially given up on expecting anything more than friends with cory. i wish i could go back to my junior year and start over from there. ..anywho.. i went to this thing w/gabe at the uc...this guy, josh or john rush was singing and playing guitar...he's really really good. so we bought his cd....deb and i went to the terrace...it wasn't as pretty as last time...i think there has to be a sunset...well. more later.